Wednesday, April 16, 2008

with 6 you get two: a SIMULBLOG...

Two songs anyway. After tonight we'll be treated to not one, but multiple performances from the lucky hangers-on, because when we're finished we'll be down to half the field. Finally. And in this year of gender parity, it seems fairly likely that tonight's victim will be female. Or at least she better be.

Because THIS is American Idol. And we kill people here. Or at least we try to kill their hopes and dreams along with their self-esteem. (At least the MJ fans think so.)

And this is a SIMULBLOG where I'm throwing away all self-censorship and typing as the action is happening live on the East Coast, with a publish at every significant break, so if you want to know, stick around and uncensor yourself. If you want to remain pure and unspoiled, then go. But come back and rant, rave or revel in the outcome.

All seven of them broke the cardinal rule about not singing Mariah Carey because she threatened to sing all 117 octives in their ear if they didn't. And Mariah is in the house, along with one of our favorite Idols evah, Mr. Elliott Yamin. So I can deal with the insipid phone calls if my man Elliott is gonna sing.

Ryan tells us almost 36 million votes were phoned in Tuesday. And they go immediately to the crappy group song. One Sweet Day, they sing. Pretty much separately. And their separate performances really highlight how crappy this group is as a, well, group. That was really not good.

There is only one week left to vote in the All-American Crappy Coronation Song Contest (ACCSC)! Get to it voters!

We are made to watch the high and lowlights from last night's performance episode. At least they make them interesting by showing us bits and pieces of behind-the-scenes commentary from the kids. Brooke tells Simon that it hurt her feeling knowing that she was just an empty bun, for instance.

Time to get "down to business."

Jason Castro is summoned to join Ryan. He's reminded of his reviews and, as we expected, they're separating them into "groups." Jason starts "team Jason."

David Cook is called in. He says he was overwhelmed by the events of the week. He captains "team David", the team that all of the kool kids want to be in.

Carly Smithson is called in. She tells Simon he's been too tough on her this season. Simon tries to explain. Carly is sent to join Team Jason.

Kristy Lee Cook comes out. She is told she's on Team David.

Elliott is next! YAY!

It's the crappy Ford commercial. The kids are puppets wanting the break free. Thankfully they found scissors.

Elliott takes the stage and Sway Penala joins Kenya and the background singers with Free. Claudette, Elliott's mom, who passed away recently, gets well-deserved remembrance. Season five, after all, would have not been season five without her. Good job Elliott.

The teams continue to be formed.

Syesha Mercado is told to join Carly on Team Jason.

Brooke White is told to join Team David, leaving little Archuleta, who waits backstage, to choose between the groups.

Yay. Phone calls. I simply will not comment.

Mariah Carey sings Bye Bye. And, if her post-performance antics are any indication, she spent the first half of the show sipping out of Paula's cup.

Let's get to the reason we're here!

Archuleta is brought to the stage, between Team David with Kristy and Brooke and Team Jason with Carly and Syesha. Archuleta is told he's safe.

Ryan tells David Cook to swap places with Syesha. I guess that means Team David is now Team Syesha. Hell, I'm confused.

Archuleta sits cross-legged the minute he's told to join the safe team. Ryan drags Team Jason/David/Carly to the squatter, leaving the bottom dwellers, Brooke, Syesha and Kristy.

After a commercial, Kristy, Brooke and Syesha stand center stage. Ryan sends Syesha back to the sofa to join her friends, the kook kids. Brooke and Kristy are all huggy. Randy says he can't call this week. Paula babbles. Simon avoids any more hamburger analogies.

Ryan tells Brooke she's safe and, after countless escapes from eviction, Kristy Lee Cook gets booted. How nice for her, though, that it was after a really good performance.

There are many many tears. We watch her journey as she listens to Ruben.

She makes the most of her final sing. Good girl Kristy. And good luck.

She better get her damn horse back.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

KLC called Simon a "butt" - how inappropriate was THAT?!?!

9:20 PM, April 16, 2008  
Anonymous I'm a jennifer junkie said...

Shoot... just as I was getting to like her!! I thought for sure it was Syesha going tonight!!

10:07 PM, April 16, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was hoping it would be Brooke who's really getting boring or Carly, I tired of her screaming her songs, she's trying too hard.

I'm just glad it wasn't one of the boys.


10:43 PM, April 16, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's supposed to be "I'm" tired of her screaming.


10:44 PM, April 16, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am really glad Kristy is gone, although I do wish her the best. I just really did not like her. At least Brooke has had more good shows than bad. I liked that David A. didn't choose sides!

10:54 PM, April 16, 2008  
Blogger DrillerAA said...

Kristy may have been inappropriate in her comment, butt, she's right...just like Simon.
I think she is locked and loaded to go straight to Country music and possibly do better than "Pickles".

11:14 PM, April 16, 2008  
Anonymous Chris(Daughtry)ROCKS said...

I never thought I'd say this but Kristy was robbed.

Her performance was far superior to Brooke's last night. And Brooke better go soon because she's cracking up, poor thing. I think if she hits the bottom 3 again, she's going to have a nervous break-down.

Well, if any of the boys get the boot before Brooke, then I'll know this show is rigged. Until that time, I look forward to seeing who gets the axe next.

2:41 AM, April 17, 2008  
Blogger Sunshine said...

Just a few things I started thinking about after yesterday's and today's remarks....

1. I thought David C. was flat last night, but I don't think it was a bad think, almost like it gave the song even more edge. Maybe it's because I'm a huge fan of the song, but I think I liked Carly the best. And when I say a huge fan, I mean Harry Nilsson's version, not Mariah's. I also thought that Kristy sounded like Patsy Cline. Just the style she put on the song, definitely made me think 50s-60s country.

2. Kristy Lee stands right about in the middle in my rank of Idols gone Country. Carrie is #1, of course and even though I think she over-sings everything instead of showcasing her nice soft voice, I still love her. Second is Josh Gracin, who was actually really good in concert. Phil Stacey and Kristy Lee are about at the same level for me, albums will be good, but they aren't fantastic artists. Kellie Pickler's next, although she's better now than she was on idol, and her newest song is pretty good. Bucky just stinks, he's whinier than any of them, and he was AWFUL on the CMT awards (all 20 seconds).
(Oh, does Diana DeGarmo count now with that new stupid show she's on with Marcia Brady, Bobby Brown and Sisqo? If so, she's at the end of my list, but she still should've beat Fantasia!)

3. I THOUGHT that was Sway, so I asked my sister and she told me I'm way too obsessed with this show (and its past), that she had no clue who he was, and that she didn't care. So thanks Jennifer for the reassurance.

4. Still p-o'ed about Michael Johns.

5. I started crying when I found out Elliott's mom died. (And Elliott's new gf is butt ugly-maybe I'm just jealous, idk)

6. I agree that the group sing wasn't great, but I thought Kristy Lee did the best. I feel bad a little, because she was showing improvement (like MJ was), while others have gotten worse or just not any better (aka Jason/Carly/Brooke).

7. Good to know that David Cook is single.

8. Maybe one of us should call in to that horrible q&a, and ask them to get rid of the stupid mosh pit! It's so distracting!

3:05 AM, April 17, 2008  
Blogger jennifer said...

Sway is Elliott's fulltime background singer. Those two have been best friends since that infamous group with the brother Brittendumb. (Or was it the brother Brittendumber?)

And Jamie Paetz is not a new girlfriend; he started dating her during the show, she went on most of the tour with him two summers ago, and they have lived together in LA ever since the tour ended.

5:43 AM, April 17, 2008  
Blogger Dave said...

Of course Jennifer knows everything about her boy Elliott!


6:22 AM, April 17, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think the show is fixed, because dialidol predicted Kristy was SAFE. BUT, it really was her time, past time actually. And she was the right one to go so I'm not too concerned about it (the fixing, I mean). I don't think they fix it ALL the time, but this was a good call on their part.

Although I agree with all the comments that KLC was getting better and did well, and that she's much better than Pickler.

10:32 AM, April 17, 2008  
Blogger jennifer said...

It's not fixed.

Dial Idol is not only non-scientific (and they admit that), but it's not the only dialing software anymore, so a lot of people are going elsewhere. It only measures the calls of the people who use it, which, IMO, is not even closely reflective of the general voting population. It doesn't take texting into account. And the VFTW voters use it in great numbers, so it made total sense that Kristy was "safe" according to the information DI had, but not safe at all.

Hell, I can guess with as much accuracy as Dial Idol can predict, considering its enormous margin of error.

11:04 AM, April 17, 2008  
Blogger thesuzvk said...

Hey, I love the Pickler!!

11:59 AM, April 17, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok, I am sure - now more than ever - that Idol needs to do a new reality spinoff - "past idols, where are they now"!

Maybe in the fall season???

What do y'all think?

12:54 PM, April 17, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...OR do like Surreal Life and put them all in a house together.

HEY! I heard TWO of the current idols on the radio today! The easy listening station at the office - first I heard one, and thought, that sure does sound like David Archuleta. Then this afternoon, I heard Jason C doing the Beatles song. I didn't realize they were going to start playing those on the radio! How cool!

5:01 PM, April 17, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The best part of the night was Elliot performing - I am glad they let him come back again this season. He truly should have won Season 5 -- He is what the show is all about. He probably is my favorite Idol from any season.

7:42 PM, April 18, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I loved seeing Elliott too. I would of been happy if for Idol gives back it was just the past Idols on the show.

I'd rather see them instead of Brad Pitt.


7:42 AM, April 21, 2008  

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