Five months in the making. We've survived auditions, bad performances, Tatiana, too many judges, too many commercials, not enough minutes in an hour, food fights, heartbreak and the crappy coronation song.
Somebody's gonna get a confetti shower at the end of two hours, and the rest of us get to reclaim our Tuesday nights, breathing a sigh of relief that the madness takes a hiatus until next year.
Because THIS is American Idol. And this is the finale extravaganza, where it takes two hours plus to crown a champ and cheese is at a premium. And we wouldn't miss it for the world.
Remember, this is a simulblog, so if you want to wait until the show airs where you are, now's the time to go research the works of Picasso, or something, because the show is about to start!
Kris and Adam are dressed in white, naturally, as the show starts. Just under 100 million votes were phoned in last night. The first order of business is to take a humorous look back at the judges over the course of the season.
Kris and Adam are introduced, arriving center stage to a standing ovation. As usual the sound guy is asleep in the booth, and neither of their microphones work. Mikalah Gordon is in Conway at Kris' hometown celebration. (Conway may never recover.) Carly Smithson is stationed in San Diego with Adam's hometown fans.
We get our first cheesy group number, with the whole group performing So What. Yes, they are all dressed in white. Can't tell if they're lip synching, but Scott is pulling off some rad dance moves. I love these group numbers, and aside from a clunker of a solo from Jasmine, it was very well done.
David Cook takes the stage drenched in green light. He's performing Permanent, in memory of his brother Adam. It's one of the best songs on his CD. (Itunes downloads of this song after tonight will benefit cancer research.) He is such a classy guy.
Oh dear. They're bringing back the Golden Idol Awards. The first award goes to the best (worst) male auditioners. I didn't miss these awards last year. Now I know why. Normund Gentle wins the award, naturally, and he gives us the show we knew he would.
Time for the first duet: Lil Rounds and Queen Latifah.
Anoop opens the show after the commercial break, joined by Alexis, who introduces Jason Mraz for an enjoyable trio, ultimately assisted by the rest of the idols.
The Kris fans applaud as we watch his journey throughout the season. Kris then takes the stage with Keith Urban. (Note to self: download this.)
Time for the girls to take the stage. Allison introduces Fergie and the girls serve as window dressing for Big Girls Don't Cry. The Black Eyed Peas then join her while Megan does some scary gyrational dance in the aisle.
Back to the Golden Idols. This time it's Best Attitude. And time for Bikini Girl, who, naturally, accepts her award wearing a swimsuit. She has had some enhancements in the last 10 months. And yes, she sings, joined mid-song by a bikini-clad Kara, who shows her how it's done. This is about the only time all season I've enjoyed Kara.
Allison takes the stage with Cyndi Lauper with Time After Time. Awesome.
Ryan chats up Kris' parents. All of the parents this year have been so cool. Ryan finds the Lamberts. Mom Lambert says both of the boys are winners. How true cool mom.
Danny's turn. He's paired with Lionel Ritchie and sings Hello seated on the big staircase, before introducing his partner. Nice pairing. Good performance.
Ryan asks the Lambert fans to applaud as Adam's journey reel begins. Adam then takes the stage to sing Beth, proving the rumor of a KISS duet correct. Awesome-ness.
Shaping up to be the best. finale. ever.
Carlos Santana brings us back from commercial. Matt joins him with Black Magic Woman. The rest of the idols show up, including the two guys, because they're Smooth.
I always like the last Ford video when it's a retrospective of the past videos. This one was good. And Kradam sing well together.
David Cook presents the guys with their new car keys on video rather than on stage.
Megan and Michael are joining Steve Martin and his banjo on stage. I think this is good time for me to visit the fridge.
The guys are all dressed in suits to set up Rod Stewart, who sings Maggie May.
The last Golden Idol award (thankfully) highlights the worst of the female auditioners, which means it's time for Tatiana!! By the look on Ruben Studdard's face, I don't think he watched the early part of this season. The joke is clearly lost on him.
And for the traditional finalists' duet, Kris and Adam front QUEEN with We Are the Champions. Oh hells yeah! Freaking Awesome!
Finally the time has arrived. The guys are standing with Ryan center stage. Simon tells both of them, basically, that they're swell.
The result bringer-in dude shows up and ensures that Danny Gokey's name is not in it. (Okay I made that part up, but what he said was boring.)
The lights are dimmed. The winner of American Idol, 2009 is...
He gets the winners trophy. And he doesn't know what to say. Poor Kris, the winner, has to sing the crappy coronation song. Adam, the runner-up will get to record a kick-ass first single.
The confetti falls as the idols join Kris behind the judges table.
Another year ends. See ya later.