Wednesday, March 05, 2008

8 guys, 6 spots: whitney sang that...

What was billed as 80s night on American Idol's last guys semi-final would have been more appropriately named "songs that were sung in the 80s but made famous during various other decades other than the 80s." Or something to that effect.

Nonetheless, if the songs were cleared on the short 50 list, then the songs were legal, even if they were later covered by Whitney and Celine.

Because THIS is American Idol.

And in the best semi-final show this season, the guys, with a few bumps, further proved that this whole gender equity business is going to probably saddle us with some annoying women while depriving us of some enjoyable and entertaining guys. But that's the way it goes.

There wasn't anyone I vehemently despised last night, but here they are, my reviews of the fellas, sorta a day late and, as always, from worst to first:

Luke Menard (Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go). I have waited seven seasons to see if anyone would take on this Wham! hit. And of all the people, Luke is not the one I would have wished for. Luke, my boy, I have given you the benefit of the doubt because you're hawt and because you seem sweet and because you're from my home state. But Luke, I just can't go this far. You are hawt. You seem nice. And it's been nice having you with us. Wave to us before you go-go.

Danny Noriega (Tainted Love). Complete with purple hair and gnarly dance moves, Danny makes me chuckle, which makes up for how much I didn't love this song. Vocally, I give him a thumbs down; entertainment value gets a thumbs up. Together it's a wash. Which is what he should do to his hair.

Chikeze No-longer-Eze (All the Woman I Need). After the first week's disasterous effort, Chikeze has consistently improved and continued to impress. This was a solid effort, not terribly memorable aside from Simon's snittiness about whether this was a Whitney cover. I'm not sure it will keep the one-name wonder in the competition, though.

David Hernandez (It's All Coming Back to Me Now). David #3 deftly avoids any stripper stories to share as an embarrassing moment (although they would have been preferable to the booger story.) It's a strong effort, with strong, confident vocals, causing Simon to give him the 100% guarantee that he'll make the finals. I don't disagree.

David Archuleta (Another Day in Paradise). David #1 starts his crusade to end homelessness at the piano before grabbing the microphone to stand and finish this maudlin ballad. It's his worst effort to date, but David #1's worst would have been most people's best effort. The judges give him tepid reviews, leading Paula to remind voters/viewers that the boy is not an android. But I'm telling you now, his habit of licking his lips between lines is getting as distracting as his breathing techniques (or lack thereof). Somebody get this boy some Chapstick. Pronto.

Michael Johns (Don't You Forget About Me). Squee! Memories of The Breakfast Club surfaces! I suddenly want a Frito and Dixie Straw sandwich. But enough about me. I wasn't exactly giddy about this outing, but it was sufficient. And, as Simon pointed out, Michael has a great performance bubbling inside him. Hopefully he's sandbagging his way through the prelims, just waiting to release it on the big stage.

Jason Castro (Hallelujah). No guitar for Jason, and it looks a little odd to see him with only a microphone. But, despite a cracked last note, this was a soft, lovely and thoroughly memorable performance. Simon even uses the "brilliant" word, something he does rarely. And he's even getting better at the post-performance banter.

David Cook (Hello). I can't remember a time when a performance has grabbed me by the throat, struck me still and kept me spellbound. (Something tells me it was around season five.) It didn't dawn on me until the judges comments that this was a Lionel Ritchie song, because David #2 had me so captured that, for once, I didn't hear a song from the 80s. I heard David Cook. And I think I am in love.

Now is the tough part. Seven of the eight deserve to stay, but only six can, unless we can figure out a way to knock off one extra girl. But that seems unlikely. And potentially illegal. So who stays and who leaves?

Who I want: Luke and Chikeze
Who should: Luke and Danny
Who will: Luke and Chikeze

Anyone taking guesses how many times we butcher Whitney again tonight? I say two.

See you then.

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17 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Did anyone hear Simon's comment after David H finished singing? It sounded something like "I liked how he stripped it down" or some such!! If I heard it correctly, it must mean that the Stripper story was known to them during the taping!!
Anyway, my top three of the night were Jason, David Cook and David A and Michael tied for third.
Going home should be Luke for sure and probably Danny (unless VFTW has their way) and if that's the case then it may have to be Chikezie.

11:22 AM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger Sunshine said...

It's All Coming Back to me now, was originally done by Pandora's Box. It's a Jim Steinman song, so yes that's where the Meatloaf and Celine come in. It was supposed to be on Bat out of Hell 2, but they replaced it with I'd Do Anything for Love. So Celine did it, made it a hit, then Meatloaf put it on his Bat our of Hell 3 album as a duet with some Norwegian chick, and if anyone remembers, he sang the song with Kat McPhee Season 5 finale.

Also, has anybody (who has last night's show taped still) looked back to see if Randy really mentioned Michael Hutchence in the context I thought? It was after Michael sang the Simple Minds song, which I know for a fact Michael Hutchins was not in. INXS was at their peak when Simple Minds came around. I still can't figure it out. Or was he just saying that he was like Michael Hutchence cos he has the Australian accent?

Also, I realized after Jason's performance last night who his voice reminded me of....Bright Eyes. I think its just that scratchiness of it, I don't know. But I can admit that I like him more and more each week. As long as he doesn't sing "September" and remind me of stupid Anwar, then I'm ok with him!

12:46 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger jennifer said...

Yes, Randy needs to brush up on his 80s musical knowledge. (Gee, they only sang 8 songs; he could have researched a little better.) He did attribute Michael's song to INXS. Oopsie. Guess that proves that Paula doesn't have sole power of stupidity.

I don't want to remember the Meat/Kat scary duet.

12:53 PM, March 05, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Norwegian in question was Marion Raven. I'd like to forget about the Katloaf duet. yeeesh!

2:05 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger Dave said...

Michael's dance moves and general style did remind me of Michael Hutchence, so maybe that's what threw Randy for a loop.

I just watched the the Meatloaf/Marion Raven version of "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" over at YouTube. It actually sounds better as a duet. It's too bad Meatload doesn't have the pipes Celine does.

2:19 PM, March 05, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have to admit that I don't get the Michael Johns love. I don't think that he's had a terribly good performance yet, and his singing seems weak to me. I wasn't impressed by his Fleetwood Mac, and I found his "Light My Fire" downright creepy (although not quite Danny Noriega singing "Tainted Love" creepy).

I didn't watch the audition or Hollywood episodes, though. Is he just riding on reputation from something there?

2:37 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger angelof_mercy81 said...

I don't want to remember the Meatloaf/Kat duet, either. That was not one of Idol's best moments.

I'm guessing we have at least one butchering of a Whitney Houston song tonight, followed by Randy's ritual "you ain't Whitney" speech. Haven't the contestants seen enough of the show to know that they'll get crucified for singing a "diva" song? Makes me wonder.

3:04 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger Dave said...

My Idol Rule #1 is:

Thou shalt not sing Whitney, Mariah or Celine unless thou art actually Whitney, Mariah or Celine.

It's too bad people haven't learned this one yet.

5:05 PM, March 05, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't have it taped anymore, but I got the impression that Randy thought Michael Hutchence sang that song, as well. Actually, it was Jim Kerr who headed up the band Simple Minds. If I'm not mistaken, he was married to Chrissie Hynde.

5:16 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger MP said...

I agree with you..and David Cook..who knew? I am a fan for sure.
I'll give you 2 Whitney's a Celine a Madonna and a Cyndi Lauper..

5:18 PM, March 05, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's funny, Dave - we should come up with a 10 commandments for American Idol! That would definitely be the top one!

5:33 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger Dave said...

I've got my Top 10 Rules for American Idol on my blog.

(How about the shameless self-promotion I slipped in there?)

5:37 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger jennifer said...

Dave's top 10 is priceless! And totally on point.

5:44 PM, March 05, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I haven't been to Dave's yet so this one may be over there but thou shall not sing Stevie Wonder either.

I loved David Cook! Is he officially hawt yet, Jennifer?

Buh-bye Luke and Danny. Chickeze wasn't as annoying as usual to me last night. I kinda felt sorry for him when Randy and Simon were on him.

5:51 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger Unknown said...

I liked the Katloaf thing...then again, I liked Sanjaya too! (Note to self: do NOT start a record label!!)

6:44 PM, March 05, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

David Cook stole the show! I am now a fan. :)

Bye bye Luke and Chikeze.

8:37 PM, March 05, 2008  
Blogger snark said...

I LOOOOVVVVEE David Cook. He is totally, totally hot, hawt, hoootttt! What an awesome talent. He has had me from the beginning- but I thought I was alone with my total crush! Not anymore! I can't wait until next Tuesday. The girls are making me tired. So very sleepy. Boring. The guys are gonna clean up.

1:33 AM, March 06, 2008  

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