Wednesday, March 15, 2006

signed, sealed, disaster, you're done...

Thirty-two and a half million votes were phoned in, says Ryan Seacrest, as we prepare for the first finals execution show of the fifth season.

YAY! Killings!

It's a simulblog, blogging live as the action unfolds and the group numbers are butchered, so ignore the misspellings and the oddly placed commas. I'm preoccupied watching the blood pour down the aisles.

We're being subjected to memories of Pickler and Kevin and treated to a repeat of Taylor and Chris. And we're told the results are "coming up." But we're promised a visit from the Wonder himself.

And it's the first cheesy Ford commercial! The kids are all campy-ing, except for Ace, who's a weird-looking troll in the Taylor Hicks Easter Bunny sort of way and Katharine, who's a cop. Not bad for a cheesy Ford spot.

Stevie's on the stage, by himself, having said he wanted to give the gang some constructive criticism. Take notes kids. This is how it's done. And he even has his new CD's logo on his sunglasses. How, uhhh, creative.

Time for the kill. Ryan pulls Kevin and Ace out. One is in the bottom.

It's Ace. Paula doesn't get it. What else is new? What's not to get? Kevin will continue to trample over the others until he gets to Mts. TayKatChrisMan. Then he'll go. Is she new around here?

The crowd is booing. Ace is looking sad. Ace's brother is looking cute.

Now to the others.

Paris is safe, Pickler is safe, Taylor is hawt, uhhh, I mean safe. And so is Chris.

Bottom row: Melissa and Elliott get their reviews. One of them is in the bottom. It's Melissa. She goes to hang out with Ace.

Mandisa is safe, and she has shoes on. Katharine continues. And we're down to Lisa and Bucky. Lisa looks about to vomit, and Bucky has his ponytail back. Lisa gets thrown off the couch. The crowd boos.

Why are you booing crowd?? Those were my picks. Shut up crowd.

The condemned are lined up, and Ace is sent back to the couch. The crowd goes wild.

Ryan tells Lisa she's safe and Melissa admits she kinda thought she would be the first to go. Forgetting those lyrics last night sure didn't help.

She gets to see a retrospective of her Idol adventures, again to the Bad Day song. And she gets a second chance at last night's song.

Goodbye Melissa.

[Link above to Daniel Powter's website, where you can hear the Bad Day song!]

tag: american idol


Blogger Vernae said...

You are genious!

Good calls, Lovey.


9:32 PM, March 15, 2006  
Anonymous Joy said...

I'm kind of sad. :( Melissa had a crap night with that performance but I really did think she'd last longer. Oh well, that's the way it goes, I guess.

9:34 PM, March 15, 2006  
Blogger Frances said...

I feel bad for Melissa, but I'm so glad Ace is still there. I hope he takes Simon and Randy's advice.

Did you see his brother standing and applauding. I'm sure the cameraman filmed him just for you, Jennifer :)

What is up with that song about having a bad day? Was that song written just for AI or is it a real single?

9:37 PM, March 15, 2006  
Anonymous Suzanne said...

For a few minutes I relished the thought of Ace getting the boot, but alas....wasn't gonna happen, so I'll just have to be happy that he was at the bottom 3. So long Melissa!

9:41 PM, March 15, 2006  
Blogger jennifer said...

I just added the link to Daniel Powter, who recorded Bad Day. There's a streaming mp3 there if you like the song.

9:46 PM, March 15, 2006  
Blogger Dave said...

Did you hear me screaming "Noooooo!!!" when Seacrest told ABM she was safe?

I don't know which I hate more: the group sings or the Ford commercials.

(Don't know what ABM stands for? Insert shameless plug here)

9:48 PM, March 15, 2006  
Blogger Frances said...

Dave, I thought I heard someone screaming.

I'd convinced myself that I was hearing things.

Who comes up with the concepts for those stupid Ford commercials/videos?
That person should be fired and forced to watch a montage of those awful things while listening to the bad say song.

10:51 PM, March 15, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

After last year's shocking Constantine boot, I was ready for anything, but I admit Ace being in the bottom three with so many more deserving to be there, still got to me a bit. Oh, I knew he wasn't going home, but you better believe those Ace fans are going to be voting in DROVES next week now. If anything, this just helped him. Can't believe Kevin and Kellie are still there! Uggghh!

6:14 AM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger Dave said...

I think Ace deserved to be in the bottom three last night, I just didn't think it would actually happen. For me, the worst of this week were Kellie, Ace and Bucky.

However, I thought Ace's status as one of Fox's chosen ones would get him at least to the top 6. One thing that might be good for Ace is that like Kevin before him, a trip to the bottom 3 tends to bring out the powervoter in people who normally just like someone.

Unless he clubs a seal to death on stage, I would look for Ace to be safe for several more weeks as his powervoters mobilise.

6:18 AM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger jennifer said...

Lisa you are so right, which makes me laugh at the Ace people who are seeing this as such a bad thing. Getting stuck in the bottom three can be the best thing because it DOES kick your fans in the butt. He'll probably be in the top three next week, not that we'll know that.

6:31 AM, March 16, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


7:26 AM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger JR said...

Now that we can see the guys and gals together the two tiers of performers are pretty obvious.
Bucky,Ace, and Kevin are on the low end of the spectrum for the guys. Lisa, "Pickles", and the recently departed Melissa made up the bottom tier for the girls. If you didn't have to listen to the packaged image dribble, "Pickles" is the most markatable of this group. If she can find a way to stay in her honky-tonk, country-rock venue, she will outlast the other five in the lower tier. Ace is going to have to really kick it up a notch if he expects to hang around much longer. If the parents of Kevin's fans would make them go to bed at a decent hour and take away their cell phones, he'd already be gone. Lisa may be the next one gone because, as Jennifer has said, she is splitting the vote with Paris and Paris is simply more entertaining. Bucky may have been helped by Melissa's departure. He could pick up the "under dog" vote. He is the weakest vocalist left behind Kevin.
I'm sorry, but I don't find anything entertaining about South Park. He's a shuffling disaster on stage (you can't call that dancing), and that nervous blinking is the most annoying thing yet. Lose him and lose him now!!! Oh, did I mention I'm not a big fan of Kevin?

7:52 AM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger purplvr said...

All I can say is that whenever Ryan announced that Zoolander, I mean Beanie Boy, ... sorry ... I mean ACE was in the bottom three, me & my fiance laughed our @$$'s off! Boy, that famous "deer in headlights" look of his really got perfected at that moment!
Melissa was sure to go, and I can't wait for Chicken Little's turn. I am not one of the many out there who love his little cheeks so much that I'd pinch them. It's getting to be so bad that I'd rather slap them. (not hard, of course ... don't wanna ruin the makeup).
Other than that, I wholeheartedly agree with Jennifer's insightful & hilarious take on this whole thing!
You're doing a great job, Jen! :-)

7:55 AM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger Dave said...

I like Kevin, but he has no business still being around at the expense of some of the other singers who have already been eliminated. I also like Bucky, but he is also clearly an inferior performer to some others who have already gone home.

Part of the problem is the forced gender balancing of the top 12. I think I would rather have Ayla around in place of either Bucky and Gedeon (as much as he creeps me out) in place of Kevin.

While I think Taylor and Chris are the outright front-runners right now, the second tier of the girls from the top 24 was deeper than the second tier of the guys, and one of the girls got caught without a chair when the music stopped.

8:02 AM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger jennifer said...

I think Kevin is a cute and funny as anybody, but there is going to come a point where he becomes a parody of himself and his mere presence will make a mockery of the show, unlike, I think Scott Savol, but exactly in the vein of John Stevens.

I really don't have a problem with him staying past Melissa or Lisa, because, frankly, I think he's more entertaining than both of them put together, but after that, everyone he outlasts will have been robbed.

8:06 AM, March 16, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

YAY Jennifer!!

8:51 AM, March 16, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

FYI...if the power of American Idol weren't completely apparent, Daniel Powter's "Bad Day" is the #1 most downloaded song on iTunes today.

3:51 PM, March 16, 2006  
Anonymous Penny said...

I guess Kevin`s sex appeal is keeping him in the running for now. Hey, it`s entertainment. When the contestants get whittled down and the going gets serious, I`m betting on Taylor or Chris. :)

8:23 PM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger SuzS80 said...

Soooooo predictable,,, went exactly as I thought,, except for Ace being in the bottom three. That was a surprise.

Did anyone see late years Idol tour? I did... unfortunately it was when Bo was sick so I missed him (and he's who I really went to see). Anyhow, point is,,, on tour they are so much better than on TV. I did not like Scott Savol at all, but live,,, he and Jessica were the best ones there by far, including the winner,,Miss Underwood. I have learned from that to not totally judge what I see on the show,, nerves play a huge part,,, good example.. Melissa.

I agree with all of you, Kevin has to go,, he is so outclassed here. And he is annoying, especially with how he reacts to Simon. Makes me want to barf,,, And how did you like the "fake set up" little girl fans who just happened to be standing in front of their "sexy" little idol boy so that their sign could be taken from them. So contrived. I hate that stuff,,, 10 year olds may buy it, but not me !!!

I suspect Ace will pick up the pace next week, and he sure will pull in a lot of votes after last night... but my heart belongs to Bucky ! Just something something about that boy !!!

8:23 PM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger SuzS80 said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

8:23 PM, March 16, 2006  
Anonymous Suzanne said...

The little girls carrying the sign were hilarious...not quite the hot women that Kevin, the sex symbol had in mind, I'm sure.

9:02 PM, March 16, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have three "tweeners" and they vote for Kevin!!!
Go figure!!!

9:16 PM, March 16, 2006  
Anonymous Musebay said...

Hi to the owner of this blog: I'm inviting you to post your reviews, unbiased critique, etc on my site: please let me know if you are interest :)

1:48 AM, March 17, 2006  
Blogger JR said...

Those sign toting pre-teens are the "face" of Kevin's fan base. Make them go to bed on a school night and he loses.

7:22 AM, March 17, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Amen to that Jr.
I'm putting my kids to bed and hiding the phones.

10:50 PM, March 17, 2006  

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